Philosophy for the Lazy (and Horny)

Hedonism: the pursuit of pleasure.

Hedonists strive to maximize net pleasure (pleasure minus pain). They maintain that pleasure is the only "intrinsic good."

But really? Do you think our only motivation is self-interest? In ethical hedonism, it is said we should act so as to produce our own pleasure. Imagine a physcho gets hold of this doctrine. Say.....MICHAEL MYERS?!!? Psychos seek pleasure by killing, maiming, and disfiguring! How can any person in their right mind, encourage this philosophy? That is definitely a major drawback to the theory.

However, some people make good of it. Ever heard of hedonist resorts? For the low price of only $100, you can enjoy a night full of romantic firsts. Join us on the nude beach for volleyball, or nude scuba-diving, and after that, naked spelunking!

Sound enticing? You know, some people like the pervs on NBC's Dateline could make productive use of this place. For those of you unaware, NBC hosted a show called To Catch A Predator, basically exposing online sexual predators. Instead of wasting their time and money in a chat room, these guys could spend a night or two at one of these places and (hopefully) be relieved.

All things considered, I think aspects of hedonism should be important to everyone. Something like, "you should derive pleasure from everything you do (even if long-term)." Yeah, I like it.

I'm off to break up with my girlfriend and request a student loan. See you on the bright side!